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TWO, FIVE, WONDER WHAT'S FOR LUNCH? 



INTENDED approach to improvising:

 

Don't think. Just listen and react. Don't play licks and patterns. Create melodies. Let the horn sing, and play from the heart.

 

ACTUAL thoughts while improvising:

 

Here comes the turnaround...classic Brownie riff goes here...nope, this tempo's all wrong. Bop scale! Cleverly ironic Daft Punk quote! Ooh, that was hip. Nobody caught it, of course. Now C-sharp diminished up the...Fail! Awww. Nick Payton wouldn't have missed that high note. Third valve is sticky...uh...where does the bridge go again? No idea. Blues lick! What the hell is happening? I wish the bass player would play the damn roots. Sloan Sabbith. Sloan Sabbith. Sloan Sabbith. Two, five, wonder what's for lunch? Hey now, that was kinda awesome. Sloan Sabbith. Oops, lost the form.

CHOOSE WISELY 



I know what you're thinking. 

 

You're asking yourself, "Who should I go see on August 16th? 

 

Chloë is at the Cineplex, but Clairdee is at Chandler Center for the Arts!"

 

Well friend, it's a no-brainer.

 

Movie houses are a dime-a-dozen, but Chandler's celebrated multi-use theater is a one-of-a-kind, elegant marvel of acoustical engineering.

 

Chloë & Aaron will be fake crime-fighting together for weeks. Clairdee & Dmitri are real life artist-warriors, appearing together for one-night-only. 

 

Their show is overpriced. Our show is free, and we do ALL our own stunts!

 

Most importantly, San Francisco vocal sensation Clairdee is the Original "Hit Girl," singing and swinging Broadway and Hollywood hits like nobody's business.

 

And is there anything more Kick-Ass than The Great American Songbook? 

We don't think so.

REAL LOVE 

“That's what real love amounts to - letting a person be what he really is. Most people love you for who you pretend to be. To keep their love, you keep pretending - performing. You get to love your pretence. It's true, we're locked in an image, an act - and the sad thing is, people get so used to their image, they grow attached to their masks. They love their chains. They forget all about who they really are. And if you try to remind them, they hate you for it, they feel like you're trying to steal their most precious possession.”
—Jim Morrison

TOP TEN IDEAS FOR ATTRACTING LARGER AUDIENCES ON THE ROAD 

10. Add the suffix "Gone Wild" to all advertisements

9. "Accidentally" misspell first name as "Pat" on marquee

8. Recruit Bebop Go-Go Dancers

7. Replace jazz noir material with that one song from Dream Girls

6. Put Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm Flailing Tube Flugelman in front of each venue

5. Offer Free Crazy Bread with every ticket purchase

4. Add Wacky Neighbor character

3. Grow long curly locks and learn to circular breathe

2. Change band name to "Candy Dulfer & The Naughty Secret"

1. Replace all sidemen with adorable kittens

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